The life of a 20-something cancer patient: Happy Holidays!

The life of a 20-something cancer patient: Happy Holidays!: The holidays always find a way to sneak up on me.  No matter how prepared I think I am, I always find myself a holiday hot mess!  I scramble...

Happy Holidays!

The holidays always find a way to sneak up on me.  No matter how prepared I think I am, I always find myself a holiday hot mess!  I scramble to get cards, gifts, and other holiday greetings out on time.  It is unenviable that I will unintentionally forget something, or someone along the way.  I need to start planning for the next year as soon as this years holidays have passed.

My health issues never fail to provide many kinks in my holiday plans.  Take this year for example.  Having surgery the week before Christmas, for lack of a better word, sucks!  Jeff and I haven't even been able to put up a Christmas tree, or decorations.  Luckily, modern technology has allowed me to record all of the lovely holiday programming to watch at a later time.  If not for that our home would be Scrooge-worthy in appearance.  The only hint of the holiday spirit has been released through christmas cookie, and apple cider scented candles.  There is never a shortage of candles at the Kleinman household.  It has recently struck me that the holiday season will be over before I have truly gotten into the holiday spirit.

Fortunately, I get to experience an abundance of holiday cheer at the hospital.  The children, and the families I visit at the cancer center never let their ailments turn them into holiday grinches.  They do whatever they can to make the hospital as festive as possible.  Families bring in platters of holiday treats, play Christmas music all season long, and reinvent their traditions for the hospital setting.  It is a joy, and my absolute pleasure to take part in as many holiday activities as my body allows.

Taking part in new holiday events is honestly wonderful, but there is a large part of me that yearns for all of the holiday traditions of my childhood.  Every December I wish I could go back in time to small town Wisconsin, waking up at home with my parents, and my sister on Christmas morning.  Feeling that carefree exhilaration that only Santa, and Christmas spirit can instill.  Waking up at three in the morning is never easier than on December 25th.  Now-a-days the first bout of nausea and vomiting starts my Christmas morning.  Let me tell you, that is definitely not the same feeling of exhilaration you get when your a child waking up for Christmas.  The feeling is more that of, I deserve a gift after dealing with this shit all night...Merry Freakin' Christmas, my ass!  You can take back every present I received if I could have just 24 puke-free hours!

I know I sound extremely bitter, angry, and like a holiday buzz-kill, but really, I'm not.  I enjoy the holidays, and I am grateful to be alive to celebrate them.  Seeing houses covered in Christmas lights, purging on holiday goodies, giving & receiving gifts, and experiencing the cheerfulness the holidays bring is heartwarming.  I truly love it.  I just wish "life" didn't have to get in the way of holiday happiness.  I wish I could experience it once again, as I did, when I was a child.  I can only hope that I give the children at the hospital a sense of that magical holiday spirit, and one day when I have a child I can enrich their life with the holiday traditions I hold so dear.  

Have a safe and happy holiday! 

The life of a 20-something cancer patient: Everyday Heroes

The life of a 20-something cancer patient: Everyday Heroes: Over the course of my lifetime, many people have asked me who my heroes are.  Since becoming sick, I have been asked more frequently.  I alw...

Everyday Heroes

Over the course of my lifetime, many people have asked me who my heroes are.  Since becoming sick, I have been asked more frequently.  I always find it hard to pinpoint just one, because heroes are all around us.  I encounter heroes everyday.

Usually the question of my heroes is prompted by my positive outlook on life.  I don't know how many times I have heard that I MUST hold the secret to happily dealing with cancer.  Let's get one thing straight...there is NOTHING happy about cancer, but I have found a lot of happiness since receiving my cancer diagnosis.  That is because I surround myself with heroes.

All of my fellow cancer patients are my heroes.  They have been dealt a similar hand to mine, and yet they are always there to comfort me when I need a helping hand.  We can relate to one another on a level that many cannot.  We laugh together, cry together, bitch & moan together, but most of all we love each other.  United we are stronger than the terrible illnesses that try to defeat us.  Everyday when I walk into the Cancer Center I know that I am among heroes.

The nurses, and all of the healthcare staff that treat, and care for patients day-after-day are my heroes. It is not an easy job taking care of the sick.  I will be the first to say that, as a patient, I am a gigantic pain in the ass.  The doctors, nurses, technicians, etc, that help me pull through the pain, and constant challenges that come with illness will forever by my heroes.

Lastly, and most importantly, my family and friends are my heroes.  I would not be the person I am today without all of you.  Through the good, the bad, the ugly, and the even uglier, my family and friends have loved me, embraced me, and accepted me for the person I am.  Never once, have you tried to change me, or have you treated me like "the sick girl".  I have remained Meg, or Megan, or to my mom, her MegPie, or to my dad, his little Meggie.  All of you provide the sense of normalcy that I crave.  Being surrounded by medicine day-in-and-day-out is exhausting.  My family and friends take me away from that part of my life.  I am able to escape the misery of being a cancer patient, and when I can't find my way out of the misery, you all are there to dig me out.  Boy, am I lucky to be surrounded by so many heroes.

To me, a hero is someone who provides hope for the future, finds the strength needed at your weakest moments, and turns sorrow into joy.  There are heroes all around us.  I'm sure all of you reading this are heroes to more people than you know.  Even if you don't think so, you are a hero to me.

Sidebar:  The booster campaign is running for a couple more days.  Please consider purchasing a shirt at www.booster.com/hopeformeg.  Thank you!