Sarah's story was difficult to write about. She didn't choose the path life has directed her in. She has been force to grow up fast, and has been forced to deal with issues most of us will never encounter. She keeps her head up and her will to live strong. I would like to tell you about another person I have met, whose story has also effected me in many ways. This person's name is Clive.
About two months ago, I noticed a new face at the hospital. Like I said many times, I am a social butterfly at the hospital. I try to talk to everyone, and become friends with all the nurses, doctors, patients and patients families. Some of them I am closer to than others. I guess I just kind of "feel out" each personal encounter. There are some people who prefer to be left alone, so our conversations are short, and there may be days that there is only a polite "hello" and a smile exchanged. There are others who will talk your ear off.(I love those types of people because I am the same way. If you know me, you know I'm a chatterbox). I can talk for hours with these people and never miss a beat. I pride myself on being able to read people, and knowing what type of person they are. The one person I had trouble reading was Clive. He didn't really offer up any kind of emotion, and I never saw him smile. He looked angry all the time, but I could see sadness in his eyes. I was curious, and I wanted to know more about this mysterious man.
About two weeks after his arrival to the hospital, I finally decided to approach him. I went over to him, pulled up a chair next to his, and introduced myself. He never took his eyes off of the TV. That didn't bother me, so I went on talking. I told him a little about myself, and asked him his name. He told me it was Clive, still without showing any emotion, or acknowledgement. I thought to myself, he's not much of a talker, so we'll just watch TV together. I made a comment about the show we were watching, and that's when I finally got him to respond. I can't remember what exactly I said, but when I said it he looked at me and just said "I love this show!" I was surprised to hear him say that, but I was happy he was talking to me. We continued to watch the show. We were laughing and carrying on like no one else was around. My nurse came up to me and said they were ready for me to go in for my next dose. I asked if it would be ok if I waited until the end of the show. My nurse told me it was ok and walked back to the nurses station. Clive looked at me and said that I didn't have to stay with him. I took my hand and put it on his. I looked him square in the eyes and said that I wanted to stay there with him. After I said that I could see tears welling up in Clive's eyes. I was unclear what was causing this man, who has shown no emotion since arriving at the hospital, to cry.
Clive wiped a tear from his eye with his other hand, and then he said something I was completely not expecting. He looked at me and said that no one has touched him in years. I thought to myself, "what does he mean by that". I was confused to say the least. He continued talking. He told me that he has spent the majority of his life striving for fame and fortune. He went on to say that he has pushed everyone away his whole life. He could never trust anyone. He was an only child, and he moved away from his family at a young age. He never got married, and never had children. He told me his life, to him, was always about making money. Nothing else matter as much as getting rich. He kept his eyes and head down while telling me all of this, as if he was ashamed. When he looked up, he looked right into my eyes and said "look at me now". He explained to me that he worked hard his whole life, and that he has made more money then he ever thought he would. Then he said the said the phrase that really hit me hard. He said that he has never been happy. I'm was shocked to hear that. Clive is eighty-four years old, and he has never been happy? I couldn't believe it.
Clive went on to tell me a little more about his life, and how he got to where he is today. I was listening, but my mind was still reeling. I was overwhelmed that this man couldn't remember a happy time in his life. He finished his story, and looked at me with that same sadness in his eyes. I kept my hand on his, and took his other hand with my other hand. I looked at him with tears in my eyes. I told him right then and there, that I was going to change that. He was no longer going to feel alone, sad and unhappy, not with me around. I asked him if I could give him a hug. I remember him saying "if you want to". I gave him the biggest hug I could(without squeezing the guts out of the poor guy). I had to go for my next dose of treatment then, but I told him to stay put...we had another episode of King of Queens(the show we were laughing about earlier) to watch. He smiled and said he wasn't going anywhere.
When I finished my treatment I went out into the area where Clive was. I was excited to get back to our conversation. I was making a bee-line right to him, when I got stopped by a nurse. She asked me what I said to Clive. I told her that it was nothing specific, that we were just chatting. She said that he was like a "new man". She went on to tell me that she had never seen him smile, and she has never even heard him talk, other than to complain. She said he was so nice to her. I looked at her and said "you can't always judge a book by it's cover". I told her that all he needed was to be opened up, and a little "Meg time"...hehe! She said it was like night and day. She was praising me for the impact I made on Clive. I smiled and said that I was just returning the favor. Sarah had made that same impact on me. She hugged me and told me to go "work some more magic". I spent the next two hours with Clive talking about everything imaginable. We made a strong connection that day, a connection that has continued to grow. Now I see a sparkle in his eyes. He loves talking to the nurses and patients(he said he's still not to keen on the docs). He tells me everyday how happy he is and my heart just melts.
No matter how young or old, people continue to amaze me. I learn so much from those around me. Whether it be old friends, new friends, family or complete strangers. I try to take something away from every conversation I have. Every person I meet has an effect on me. Take time to listen to others and share the things you learn with the ones who mean the most to you.
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