Holiday Nostalgia

Do to on-going health issues(as many of you know), and many continuous financial issues that I have had to endured over the past six years prevent me from being with my family during many months of the year.  I suffer from depression, anxiety, and insomnia on a day-to-day basis, but each of those conditions are wildly exhasterbated when I am forced to miss family gatherings.  Especially the holidays.  I would sacrifice a limb, I would take a bullet, I would make this day my last for one more magical day with my family and friends.  For "Pete's Sake", I would sell my soul to the devil himself just to celebrate a traditional holiday once again!

We had plans to be with family during Thanksgiving, but my health took a turn for the worse.  On top of that our heater at the house decided to quit functioning.  It was inevitable, we would not be traveling back to Wisconsin for Thankgiving. We would not be spending quality time with those we love, and rarely see. We would not get to delight in the delicious Thanksgiving meal and all the tasty treats.  I barely moved out of bed other than to vomit(gross...sorry), and my husband coordinated everything with the heating company.  What a pleasant Thankgiving, eh?  I shouldn't complain. There are many people with much less. We all deserve generosity, caring, and help during the holidays.

I didn't think I would be able to spend any holidays with my family this year, but much to my surprise my doctors gave me clearance to travel!  I am absolutely elated that I get to spend Christmas with my remarkable family.  Being back in the town I grew up in is like living in a fairytale.  Reminceing about all the holidays I commorated in this close knit community.  I took it for granted for all those years.  I can now see the heart, the soul, the whimsy, the compassion, the love, and the honor that each and everyone brings to this town and so many towns like it around the world.  It's breathtaking.  I am blessed that my "blinders" have been stripped off just in time.  My eyes have been broader to notice the stunning elegance and grandeur that the holidays allocate to those whom take the time to observe the meaning behind the glitter and shimmer.

We live in a fast-passed, high-energy, money-hungry, over-worked and exhausted world.  I am certainly guilty of it myself.  I am not a life coach, a therapist, a counselor, or a social worker. I will never claim to be one.  I just "call 'em like I see 'em".  Most of us need to take a step back for a while.  Relaxation is a GOOD thing.  It will make us more productive, and a hell of a lot nicer to be around.  The holidays are the perfect time to take a break.  Spend time with family and friends.  There doesn't even have to be gifts involved.  I know figuring out what to buy for people can be extremely taxiing on a person.  Just spend time together.  I think everyone would be surprised how rewarding that type of holiday can be.  Friendship and love is a timeless gift.

Happy Holidays! XOXO

Wishing and hoping for more time

THOUGHTS


Dawn turns to day,
As stars are dispersed;
Wherever I lay,
I think of you first.

The sun has arisen,
The sky, a sad blue.
I quietly listen,
The wind sings of you.

The thoughts we each keep,
That are closest to our hearts,
We think as we sleep,
And you're always my last thought.



CRY


I know I cry a lot,
For many reasons,
Such as, sad movies, abandoned dreams,
Songs that remind me of the past, and on
Particularly rough day most anything can
Bring on the tears. But lately, what I've been
Crying about the most is myself.
I know it is terribly selfish and insensitive to
All of those around me whom have shown me so
Much support and unconditional love.
I can't help dwelling on the person I used to be,
The person I lost, and the future I may never
Experience.

Holiday Wishes

It's more than obvious that the holiday season is in "full swing".  The stores aisles are filled with gift ideas, decorations for inside and outside, all the traditional holiday baking fixin's, and all sorts of cute gift wrapping paper, as well as, adorable stocking stuffers. The city workers put up lights along all of the treelined streets, all of the greenery in the community parks, and they fancy up the lampposts, as well as, many other areas of the town. There is a crisp chill in the air, shimmering snow on the ground, holiday songs blaring, both classic and new.  The best part of this glorious holiday season is coming home after a long day, changing into cozy PJ's, making yourself a warm mug of tea, hot chocolate, coffee, or apple cider, snuggling into a warm blanket, and putting on a favorite holiday movie or cherished holiday music.  It doesn't get much better than that!

It's not the gifts that bring us joy and happiness during the holiday season.  Yes, of course, they help.  Who doesn't enjoy recieving gifts? I would never turn down a gift, ha! Believe me, I am no Mother Theresa.  I try to give back as much as I can because I have been shown so much support, love and encouragement over the years.  My entire life, not only just the cancer years. I am fortunate to be able to give back without risking my health, or the health of others.  Anything I can do to help a friend, or a complete stranger in need, I will do my best to help out.  Nothing will stop me from putting a smile on the face of someone feeling down.  Even the strongest person needs a little(or big) miracle sometimes....or should I say say a little magic?

Most people who read this post may I think "she's officially lost her marbles"! That could very well be true. I'll be the first to admit it, but I think bringing back simplicity, love, and time shared with the ones we love need to be returned to the spirit of Christmas and the Holiday season.  Allow yourselves to smile "just because" and take a step back from the "daily grind" and the rut of the same ole stale routine we get stuck in without even recognizing it.


What I would like to know is what are your Holiday wishes this year? Do you want to embark on an amazing vacation? Do you want to change careers? Do you hope to get married or have a baby this year? Do you want to get a puppy? Do you want to change you hair color or cut?

I am very interested to hear all of your holiday wishes, if you are willing to share them with me. You never know I might be able to put in a good word and turn that wish into reality!

Feel free to share your wish with me through:
A comment on this blog site
A comment on Google+
Facebook
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Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!